OFF AIR — Insidious The Last Key

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Welcome to OFF AIR, my informal blog posts that will go up occasionally, usually unfiltered and roughly edited.

Last night I saw the new Insidious movie, the Last Key, at a preview screening with my mate Heath. Heath got some free tix and kindly invited me along as we both share a love for horror movies.

I saw the first Insidious movie when it came out, maybe the second one too, I can’t remember. We both thought this was the third movie in the series and wasn’t until we got home that Heath mentioned it was the fourth. So that goes to show how knowledgeable I’ll be on this movie and the series itself.

The movie follows the old lady from the first movie who can see ghosts. She’s the main character in this one and is accompanied by two Aussie actors as her sidekicks, one of the dudes from Saw and another dude I remember being in that Thank God You’re Here show. They are funny and provide some comic relief, but their jokes don’t always hit the mark. Though there was one chick at the front of the cinema who thought they were the next Key and Peele.

The plot is very straight forward and follows the same horror tropes we’ve come to expect. And that’s unfortunate considering James Wan (Saw, The Conjuring films) directed the first and produced the other films. It’s the classic tale of haunted house and troubling childhood and paranormal investigations and scary ghosts who don’t want to hurt you.

The script was pretty how-ya-going as well. I could almost predict the lines coming from the main character Elise. I don’t like saying this, but I could probably write a better horror movie. The script treated the audience like a child, as if this was their first introduction to a horror movie. But it just so happens it’s the fourth addition to the Insidious franchise. That’s what this is, another cash grab ruining a serious horror franchise.

The movie was scary in parts, certainly the demon/monster was all shades of fucked up. I expected to have that thing visit me in my dreams as I slept later that night. But I don’t care how scary or gruesome you make your monster, if the script and plot aren’t on point, you won’t frighten me past a few cheap jump scares.

And that’s where this movie hits a low for me. Majority of the scares were due to loud noises or over emphasised tension in scenes. The Conjuring films do a good job at building tension naturally through the script, breaking horrific moments with some light-hearted affairs so you can catch your breath, but this movie used jump scares to try and build tension. A big no no for me in horror movies. Don’t treat me like a fucking idiot when I watch your movie. I know that some scary bitch is going to jump out from the corner, just get it over and done with already and line me up for the next scare. Don’t play out that scene for two minutes and finally reveal the big jump scare. The latest IT movie fell into this category too, it used jump scares and loud noises to get a rise out of the audience. But it’s script was good, and I cared for the characters, so I didn’t mind as much. IT was scary because I cared, Insidious the Last Key isn’t that scary because I really didn’t give a shit about anyone.

But at least the monster was cool.

4/10 screams that sound more sexual than scared

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